Disappointments are all around.
Expectations can make a huge deal in how we process life.
I know I wished I would have learned some better strategies earlier in my life in how to accept and allow life’s unfolding to happen rather than be in so much resistance. Like think that situation wasn’t fair or that person should act a certain way.
Life is what it is. We give meaning to each event, person or circumstance. I know my expectations of wanting life to be perfect set me up for lots of disappointments and being uncomfortable because of it.
2020 has certainly given all of us a lot of experience with being uncomfortable. Just as you think you have had enough, something else is piled on. Ice storm, no electricity or trees split apart.
I know my natural tendency is to find a way out of being uncomfortable. I want to ignore, go to solutions and keep moving forward.
I don’t like being with angst or things that don’t feel good.
It’s important to your brain that you show it that you can handle being with uncomfortable. You don’t want to overreact to the external circumstances of life.
You want to notice the adversities or struggles but not let your emotional system take over.
So many illnesses today are because of the compounded stresses we feel and we have not been taught how to deal with it. Too often people try to numb out what we don’t like with food, sex, drugs, alcohol or social media.
It’s important to know that “uncomfortable” is part of life.
Life is full of rough spots.
The more you can acknowledge and know that then as strange things happen they don’t throw off your nervous system or cause greater degrees of stress.
For instance, let people who oppose you be your teacher. Let them show you what you want more of because of the contrast you see, not make them wrong and rage about their likings. I know for me this is one of my greatest challenges.
When you notice you are out of control, also know ways to calm yourself down. Is it sitting to meditate for a few minutes to relax your nervous system? Is it to take a walk and breathe more deeply to release some of the anxiety?
You want to be in a better feeling space before you tackle the issue. Then your mind can find solutions.
The more serene you are inside, the better options for answers will be available.
As Richard Rohr states, “You know, all those tragedies. That’s the way the self expands.”
We either learn from pain or pleasure. And the sad part is that most of us wait for the pain.
Let this crazy time of being uncomfortable teach you how to live a kinder more compassionate life.
Learn strategies to help you process the upheavals in life so you win, and life doesn’t take you down.