What baggage are you carrying around that keeps you stuck in thinking the only way to live today is what you know from the past?
The future is full of possibilities if you have new lens on to enjoy today.
Today is a gift. That’s why they call it the present.
Understanding the treasures of the past, can be helpful as you are creating your dreams for today and tomorrow.
But, they can also be limiting how you live. Realize life is like a car. The front window is huge, giving you a broader perspective and openness for what is coming. The rear view mirror is smaller so you can let go and move on to what’s possible.
Which is it for you?
Are there parts of your life you feel freer to soar? Like in work, are you free to voice your opinions or have the career you want? Do you see your relationship as equal? Chores are distributed, you speak up and what you say matters?
Or in your relationships, do you notice you cling to “the way things were done?” Like, the man of the house decides what happens.
If you are a Boomer, think of cultural norms of that time and how they are no longer serving you or society today.
What the man said was most important.
Women were inferior and catering to what the man wanted.
Dress was more formal.
I know for myself, I still hang on to some habits or norms that seem so natural. Like making sure I have dinner on the table for Bo when he gets home from work. Taking care of most of the domestic stuff. He takes care of maintenance of house and vehicles.
The difference is we now choose to do some of the same roles because we have decided how our lives work well together.
His love language is acts of service so I know it matters to him when I do things that I know he likes. So it adds to the enjoyment of life together.
Because of Bo’s willingness to help and be a part, I find it easy to play in that role of the past. I don’t have some of the same feelings of being less than or not respected because I am the woman and he is the boss.
It doesn’t have to be baggage or wrong if you choose to bring the past to the present, if you are making a conscious decision and it works for your life today.
You are deciding that it fits you and your life today.
It’s baggage when it’s weighing you down, you are complaining. For instance, if you hold some grudges and resentments.
If it no longer serves you, it becomes baggage. You can’t move on. You feel heavy.
It’s not much of a change, but a change of perception.
A fresh start allows you to take what was good about the past, and bring it forward with you.
You are free to thrive because you adapt to what you need today. With the awareness of how you feel, you have the courage to speak up and share your concerns and desires when things aren’t working or are fitting to your lifestyle.
It’s not about doing what others want because it is how it was done, but more about what is right for you or your life today.
Just like how life has expanded in how our kids relate to each other in their marriages. Husbands help with household chores, child care and responsibilities beyond their careers. They are more involved with their children.
But now with this pandemic, life is asking for us to evolve more. Women with children are feeling more of the burden. All their support systems are gone - their work, schooling for the children, childcare, girl time or their family is quarantined away.
Things that were working, aren’t necessarily working. It’s time to drop the old and find the new.
In order to thrive you must be aware of how you are living for today. Not be so attached to the past - because it worked then or so you thought it did.
Notice what baggage is holding you back from thriving.
Is it your unwillingness to live for today, not the past?
Is it your stubbornness to think you know best?
Is it your attitude of negativity or pessimism? Or,
Is it this is the way we did it when you were growing up so it must be right for today thinking?
Unchain from the baggage you bring so you can enjoy all of life’s possibilities and joys.
Life is more than the past.
Set new boundaries for what works through communicating with those you are living life with.
Think about your relationships. Your work. Your health. Your peace. What do you need today?
Today is a new day, make it new, fresh and alive so you can thrive.