When I grew up, we were taught not to feel, to suck it up, and move on. But unfortunately, I have learned over the years how unhealthy that philosophy can be.
Yes, it can help you move on from a situation but also harden you and your body.
Yes, momentarily, it can help protect you. But, it can stay in your body as trauma if you don’t process it by feeling whatever happened to you
Your body is meant to feel whatever is there. It has natural protection mechanisms for you. Your body speaks to you. The problem is most of us need to listen to it. We think our minds are smarter.
This week we visited the Bourbon Trail and Keeneland Race Track in Kentucky. What a beautiful country. One day we were visiting a few of the distilleries in Louisville when by happenstance, we walked past the bank where the shooting had just taken place on the past Monday.
My heart sank, and my body chilled seeing the flowers, messages, and police protecting the space. Their call is for more LOVE.
Why are we here where shooting is an answer to the pain we are feeling?
Individually and collectively, we need to rise above the darkness that is swirling and creating these painful acts.
It’s time to get real. To be honest with ALL you are feeling and dealing with. Not sugarcoat. I get that it’s not easy to feel some of the hurt or horrible situations. But neither is the craziness that is happening all around us now.
As John Lennon says, “One thing you can’t hide – is when you’re crippled inside.”
Where are you at your wit’s end? Where do you think you can’t handle this anymore?
Where are you hiding?
You are where you are. Don’t make yourself wrong.
I’m calling on you and me to rise above and quit avoiding our feelings and blaming.
What do you need? Who can help you?
You need to applaud yourself that you have been able to traverse life and all that has come before you. You need to celebrate all the ways and strategies you have used to help you handle what has been given to you or that you have experienced.
They worked then, but today something new is needed.
It’s time to free yourself from the pain, the resentments, the hurts, the hateful rhetoric, and the illnesses.
There is too much pain inside all of us. People are exploding.
Where are you hurting? Where are you in pain?
Can you own that? Do not make it wrong or bad.
Can you name what you really are feeling?
Can you allow yourself to feel the hurt, the loss?
Can you stay in pain without numbing it, whether with drugs, Facebook, or busyness?
Can you see why all of this is there for you?
How are you running from the hurt instead of saying what you are really feeling, like “I feel like a loser,” “I’m so angry at them for..” or “I’m scared?”
What help do you need? Some of your pain can be horrendous. Some professionals can help guide you through releasing all that has been built up. To help you make life more doable.
Medical doctors can help. Alternative medicine can help move you back to wellness. Spiritual guidance can support your journey. Support groups can help.
Trust you know what is best for you today. Not yesterday or the future. But what do you need today to help you?
Feelings will move through your body if you don’t hold on to them. They are messengers for something higher for you. Whether it is time to let go of an old pattern that did help protect you at some point or whether to get your attention to seek something different than what you are doing.
Too often, you fight for your limitations rather than seek a solution that could help resolve the situation, often by feeling what is there, owning it, and letting it go.
When you hold on to your feelings, they build up and block the flow in your body, which can result in illness, pain, and explosions. Patterns are formed, and the problems become bigger.
Like this Harry Potter quote, J.K. Rowling, “I DON’T CARE!” Harry yelled at them, snatching up a lunascope and throwing it into the fireplace. “I’VE HAD ENOUGH, I’VE SEEN ENOUGH, I WANT OUT, I WANT IT TO END, I DON’T CARE ANYMORE!”
“You do care,” said Dumbledore. He had not flinched or made a single move to stop Harry from demolishing his office. On the contrary, his expression was calm, almost detached. “You care so much you feel as though you will bleed to death with the pain of it.”
You often don’t see a way out. I’m here to tell you there is.
Your mind only makes you believe you can’t handle it. When you stay on the level of the problem, it doesn’t seem like you can work through the trauma, the pain, or the hurt. But, with God or your Higher Being, everything is possible.
Feel whatever you feel. Feel life. Live life. Which means the ups and downs, all of it. Then you can enjoy the highlights of the greatest feelings of joy and the sorrows of losing those you love. It’s all part of it.
By feeling what is there, you can free yourself to live life to the fullest.