What Are You Giving Your Attention To?

As you retire, you realize the importance of family and friends in a deeper way.  You begin losing people that are close to you.  You begin losing your connections to others.

Loneliness becomes a big concern.  Being isolated causes downward spirals in one’s health and life.

February, Valentine’s Day, is time to celebrate the love you share. Really all the time is.

I know it’s hard to manage all parts of your life at the highest level all the time but these special days could be the spark you need to liven things up.

They can be great a reminder to acknowledge those that matter to you and all you have to be grateful for.

I remember hearing so many times the joke about “I told her I loved her when we got married 20 years ago.”

But the sad part, too many people think things like that one comment are enough. Too often relationships are taken for granted. They lose hope, lust and fun.

They aren’t savored in action like our words say.

Relationships take work.

How much attention are you giving to your relationships?  Is it more a matter of routine or are you expressing genuine love and excitement with each other?

What does sharing your love look like for you?  For each person that will look differently.

In Gary Chapman’s Love Languages, he said there are five (5) love languages — acts of service, gifts, words of affirmation, quality time and physical touch. 

What Chapman says is that each of you have a different way of receiving love.  If you like acts of service, most likely you do that with ease to your partner.  But the catch is, if that is NOT their love language, they aren’t receiving your love like you expect.  You share love in their love language.  Like mine is quality time.  I love my undivided time with Bo – like on our walks.  It makes me feel special and it’s a time to connect.  But for him, he likes when I do things for him.  Yes, of course I love that too, which he is so very good about doing.  But, my highest need is that time with him.  Be seen and heard.

Use these special days as reminders to reconnect with those people you love at a deeper level.

Give your attention, affection and affirmation to those that matter to you.  Take time to cherish your relationships while you have them here with you.

Think about a few people in your life who could benefit from you sharing words of affirmation, spending time with them or doing something for them.