Inspiring Messages – Dottie Hager

LIFE IS NOT ABOUT TOMORROW

What are you putting off for “someday?”

Someday is not one of the days of the week.

What are your excuses and justifications that you are using to put off what you want? “When I retire.” “I don’t have the time.” “I’m too busy.”

Bronnie Ware is the author of The Top Five Regrets of the Dying. She talks about the regrets people have, the guilt and the pain because they didn’t live the life they wanted. A few of the common regrets she talked about are:

Wished they had the courage to live a life true to themselves, not what others expected of them.
Worked too hard
Not letting yourself be happier

Which one of these regrets speaks most to you?

What are you putting off thinking you will do tomorrow?

Recently, we have had a few situation in our lives that have brought this message home strongly. Our good friend was diagnosed with glioblastoma. My sister has been diagnosed with ALS, and my husband’s mother made her transition this week.

What a wake-up call for me!

As I reflect about the importance these people play in my life, I want to know I’ve made the most of the time we have together. I want to make sure we have shared the messages of our hearts.

There is an infinite amount of time we have together. Am I making the most of it?

That is why I am speaking out about them.

I don’t want you to live with regrets.

I want you to think about what really matters to you and DO IT!

Are you willing to do frivolous things that you want — like get your shoes shined? Look what a gift that is to both people?
My husband was happy because it’s not something he does. I took the picture because it was fun to see him doing that for himself.

Are you taking time to enjoy your friends or are you too busy, someday? Are you enjoying something different that can bring you joy like going to the corn pastures when the first batch of corn is harvested?

Crazy the amount of fun we had, totally out of my element. We got “bushels” of corn. All of a sudden we were thinking about all the people we wanted to share this fresh corn with and tell the story about getting it.

Are you taking the time to let those around you know they matter? Are you sharing your feelings with them? Letting others see how affectionate you are with each other. Taking time to emphasize little rituals you both love – like tapping on the window as you say goodbye for the day.

What wake-up call do you need to live, be and do all you want today?

I know… You can’t do everything you want today. But, have you booked it in? Even if it is every week, visit your kids, your grandkids or family. Take that vacation to Hawaii or visit every national park. Be kinder, more generous.

What are you putting off until tomorrow?

Share with me one action that you are going to take that you have been putting off thinking “someday” I will do that.

Email me at dottie@dottiehager.com or go to Facebook and share what you are committing to do.

What Matters to You

One of the benefits of aging is that you tend to have greater clarity about what matters to you. And, an unwillingness to get involved in things that others think you “should” do or that don’t fill you up.

It allows you to narrow down what works for you and what doesn’t.

As you go through your days and your life, and the choices you make, are you paying attention to what matters to you and what feels right for YOU?

Have you taken the time to get clear about what you want for the next decades, or the rest of your life?

A couple of the tools I teach that can help you are:

PAY ATTENTION to your feelings about everything you do. Use your feelings as your emotional guidance system. Use the contrast of situations that you like or don’t like as guides in your life. If it feels good, keep doing it. If it doesn’t, make some adjustments. But notice. The more you do what you love, the more your life expands and manifests your desires. Your life flows and is more enjoyable.

KNOW the feelings you want to experience in everything you do. If those aren’t present in your life whether personal, work or relationships, shift something to feel those. Like for me, I want joy, love, connection, ambition, freedom and generosity to come through in all I share or experience.

Take time to create the life you want.

We just returned from a cruise to the British Isles. We enjoyed the adventure. We saw some fabulous places and learned about other cultures.

We started in Amsterdam. As bicycle people, we have never seen a place that had so many bicycles everywhere. We needed more time there and better planning to get in the art museums – Van Gogh, Anne Frank and all the things Amsterdam offers.

We went to the British Open. I followed Jordan Spieth, hole to hole for a while, saw some of other favorites, Rory McElroy, Rickie Fowler and others. Saw the magic of the tournament.

We visited Liverpool and saw where the Beatles grew up, and learned more about their history. Fun, for us Boomers, who lived our lives through their music.

As we were assessing, what’s next for us, one of the realizations I had was I don’t like dreary weather, darkness around. We had to prepare for that every day.

It was a great time BUT my heart didn’t zing and my spirit didn’t soar.

I know I am in charge of how my days go no matter the outer conditions. We DID make the most of our time. BUT

Something was off. I was paying attention to my emotional guidance system.

I like being around sunshine. It makes me feel more alive, happy and connected. Rainy, cold and dark skies are not my idea of a fun vacation. I didn’t feel the freedom, connection that happens when it’s right for me.

As much as we love to travel, London was never on my list to visit because it always felt dark and dreary. Yet, I know so many people love it, it has a depth of historical context, and I know it has great significance in our world. I know I “should” but could never get excited about it.

Now I know why. I know more about what matters to me.

I have wanted to experience the world. I didn’t think about it from a perspective of what mattered to me as much as I wanted to take it all in.

But now, I have realized that there are just some places that are not for me EVEN though they have great history, opportunities and culture.

Just like with all of life, there is a smorgasbord of opportunities.

What you choose and what I choose may not be the same. It doesn’t make it right or wrong, it is just different.

Travel is one way I understand life better.

The important message is to know what matters to you. Sometimes you have to experience things to know at the most subtle level why it’s not right for you. Let that help you to get closer to what it is you desire.

Pay attention to all that life sends your way. Take what feels right and leave the rest.

Live a life that matters to you no matter how trite or small the choices may be.

Where in your life do you need to assess what matters to you, to get clearer on what you want for your life? Sign up for a discovery call with me to help you gain clarity and focus.

www.dottiehager.com

Explore The Freedom Calling You

Explore The Freedom Calling You

In honor of observing, July 4th, Independence Day, I felt like it was the perfect time to think about freedom and what that means to your life today.

I think for the most part, people rarely think about the actual purpose of this holiday. But, with Brexit fresh on our mind’s, it certainly shows how:

People want something new.
People are fed up with the way things have been done.

Yes, it’s a time here that many are fed up, too.

So you could say it is all in perfect timing to remind us of the freedoms our nation provides us. In the USA, we are blessed with so many freedoms.

I know that I haven’t taken the time to truly appreciate the opportunities given to me because I live here. It’s easy to not appreciate or realize the differences about
other countries and governments unless you travel or consciously learn about them.

There is a point and time when “freedom” isn’t happening that something screams out, “I have had enough.”

Often, not a pretty time, much turmoil and pain.

You want to have the FREEDOM to choose, to have a say or to feel like you matter.

On a more personal level, where in your life are you looking forward to more freedom?

Are you a new mom feeling like you haven’t any time to yourself?
Are you a new retiree loving the freedom from schedules, routines and career? Or,
Are you an adult, just tired of all the responsibility maturity brings to you
keeping a house, caring for children, and adult parents, and juggling your career?

Where is freedom calling you?
Take this Independence Day as time to get yourself balanced and see how having some
freedom allows you to be better at all you have chosen for your life.

Use these special holidays as a time to reflect on your life and see what you need.

Rather than revolt or have a mid-life crisis:

How can you see this holiday as an opportunity to look within and hear what is calling you?
What do you need to nurture your desire for freedom?
Is it a day away from the kids, the responsibilities, or taking up something for yourself like art lessons, bike riding?

Look at why people have mid-life crisis. Look at why people look forward to retirement.

I know without the freedom to make the choices I want for my life, I can become resentful, angry and frustrated with what is happening.

Realize how important freedom is, not only to our nation, but to your life personally.

How can you honor this Independence Day and be appreciative and grateful that our forefathers gave us the rights and opportunities to FREEDOM?

Share with me on my Facebook page, www.Facebook.com/dottiehager/coach what freedom is calling you.

Is What You are Doing Helping You Reach Your Maximum Potential

Is What You are Doing Helping You Reach Your Maximum Potential

Summer is almost here. For many people, summer is a time to enjoy life, take vacations and have a more relaxing lifestyle.

Summer generally has people outside more, enjoying nature and spending time with friends and family. Just like the picture above. My husband painted this picture, of one of our favorite hiking trails in Tahoe, for his high school football coach who wasn’t doing well.

Take notice how much lighter and freer summer appears to be. Think about situations in your life that can use some lightness, relaxing attitude.

Do you have deadlines you are trying to meet? People in your family who aren’t doing well?

What can you do to change the feelings to be lighter?

Ask for help to unload some of the burdens you feel.
Break your routine, and take a walk outside.
Create a “God” jar. Make a list of all the pressures you are feeling. Choose one thing you can do right now. Let go of the rest by putting all the others in your God jar, knowing God will handle whatever you ask of him.

When you are in a relaxed state, you allow more things to come to you, you are open and available for the Universe to provide you what you want. When you catch yourself in stress, there is resistance which holds things back from you because you are closed off.

What shift can help you be lighter, more relaxed?

And, remember that each season has special meaning and purpose for life. Just like spring is a time for planting and new life. Winter is a time to restore and recharge, like bears hibernating. Fall is a time for letting go and releasing things. Summer provides maximum light encouraging all living things to reach their maximum potential.

How can you use this summer as an opportunity to help you reach your maximum potential?

Allow each season to help remind you of the cycles of life, knowing there is a time for growth, a time to prosper, a time to release and a time to go within.
Use the seasons as a way to add to your life some tools or resources to make your life more loving and peaceful.

How can you use the excitement and enthusiasm for summer to allow for a less stressful life to continue after summer?

Find one way you can use “Summer” to help you reach your maximum potential. What would you need to release to allow that in your life?

Use the summer light to move out any darkness that is hiding you from being all you came here to be.

What does freedom mean for you?

What freedoms do you feel based on where you live? What does freedom mean for you? Have you been involved with any movements for more freedom? Change happens as you move with your passion. Is freedom a driving force for you to be committed to create some change?

What does commitment mean to you?

Where in your life is it easy for you to make a commitment? Where is it harder for you to stay committed? Dig deep and see what patterns are there. Is there a certain area of your life that it happens in? Ask yourself, what is it that keeps you from following through with your commitment? Are you sabotaging your efforts? What is that about? What would it take to make a shift so that you would be able to follow through with your commitments in all areas of your life?

What type of adventures do you take?

Adventures wake you up to life’s possibilities. What type of adventures do you take? Where in your life do you allow yourself to trek into the unknown or vastness of life? What happens for you when you take an adventure? What adventure are you willing to commit to in your life to awaken you to more of life? To put some more fun into your life? Be willing to take that action.

What are your fantasies?

What have been some of your fantasies in your life? How have you used them? Have you created something from them? Think of at least one fantasy you have had that you have not done anything about. What action could you take to move that from a fantasy – just wishing or hoping – to a reality in your life? Take that step this week. Commit to moving forward in your life.

Where are you letting fear rob your joy?

How does fear rule your life? Where in your life do you allow fear to take over your desires? I skied for years successfully and was really pretty good. I loved the fun, beauty and adventure of skiing. Recently, we went skiing. Prior to this trip, I had an accident on the last run of the day so I was quite afraid as we began this adventure. Why, did I let that one accident override all the years and fun I had had? Fear… I took a lesson in hopes that my skills would override the fear I had created. I thought I was disciplined enough with my thoughts to know how to stop myself if I got into that position of being afraid. During my lesson, I was good, had great thoughts and feelings of what I was doing. I felt I could do way more than they were asking me. Then, I went up on the mountain, I let fear take over. All the discipline of focusing on what I wanted went out the window. I allowed fear to take away my fun. Had I really had more faith and discipline, I could have had some fun. Where are you letting fear rob your joy? How could you use discipline with your thoughts to release that fear?

What dreams do you have burning inside of you?

What dreams do you have burning inside of you? What thoughts are you thinking about how to make them come true? Are you using fantasy thinking that someday when I have the time or have enough money to retire? Or, could you use some discipline to help create your dream? Write out your dream. See it clearly. Then ask yourself, what action step could I take today to bring that dream closer to reality? Start out doing something 3 times a week. Then increase the number of days you are doing something toward that dream. Before you know it, your dream will be a reality! Start now, no more excuses or wishful thinking.