Author: Dottie Hager

Each decade of life tends to have a purpose or focus.

As you think about your past, consider each decade of your life. What pops into your head about each? For me, the ones that pop in my head are moving, school, college, marriage, career, family, kids leaving home, and retirement.

You may not have anticipated these phases at the time, but life generally flows in these patterns.

Your life is defined by what was important to you as you went through life.

Was there lots of happiness? More sadness? Struggles?

What were the highlights – of each decade?

I know that at this age, mid-70s, it is easy to reflect on and think about your past since most of it is behind you.

I know that at this stage in life, many think about how long they want to live. But recently, I was listening to a podcast, and the host was arguing for a change in focus. Instead of thinking about extending longevity, what if we could focus on living healthily? He was saying that just extending life is costing society too much—not just financially but mentally and emotionally, too. The shift should be to how we can help others be healthier.

My husband, Bo, was given a book by Bobb Biehl, Decade By Decade: Life Is Surprisingly Predictable.

It’s interesting because in my coaching, I have often asked clients to review their past by decades. Think about where the blessings and heartaches were. Think about your gifts and talents that weave through all. What parts of your past are haunting you, and do you need forgiveness?

As we read this book, it’s a nice summary of how life is predictable. He uses “S” words to help you focus, like 30s—Success. 40s Significance/Struggle. Boy, I’ve always said this stage is the hardest. You are trying to juggle so many things—family, career, self—maybe even being a caretaker of your parents. I wished I had known more about grace and kindness then.

And, for me, the 70s were the Succession. Reading this section was interesting because I didn’t think as he discussed it. “Who will carry on what I’ve been doing?”
I have talked about the legacy you want to leave. He talks about being a mentor. I love that idea. Young people need great role models. Bo and I’ve talked about the “lessons” we hope the kids and grandkids learn from us. Bo even talked about wanting to write them down.

What is your focus and intention for the decade you are in?

Life matters.

The more you live on purpose the more meaningful your life can be for you. You don’t always think about just surviving.

As I say, I want you to thrive.

As I think about life, I think retirement should be later. I think more people would live healthier if they were still living on purpose or for something. I wonder how we can figure out how to live, relax and enjoy life more along the way rather than thinking, “I can’t wait to retire to…travel, do what I want, etc.” Why not do that along the way? Just think about how much healthier and more balanced your life might be. Too many people I know are not happy about these retirement years. They are just passing days and complaining about their health. Health is a huge issue. Money can be a concern. Aging isn’t for sissies. It’s challenging.

Maybe that’s why I phased my work “Thriving in unRetirement.” Of course, I didn’t know then what I know now. But I feel more strongly about how important it is to have a purpose. Keep that bigger than whatever is happening to or for you. You still need that WHY to help you through all that is happening.

Think about what you would say this decade is for you, but also, think about what you’d LIKE it to be for you. Open to greater possibilities – even though it might now look possible.

Keep the hope and wish alive.

Life is predictable, and let it go toward your desires.

As you reflect upon your life, can you look at it and see there were no mistakes?

Do you see that everything that happened to and for you was to help you evolve into the greatest you, the one you were created to be?

I know it is hard to think that some of the unbelievable things happening aren’t mistakes.

It’s hard to imagine how the tragedies can be for you.

But, what I know is life is for you.

Life is trying to open you and me up to the Highest and Greatest.

I know there has been lots of resistance for me. I thought I was in charge, and when things weren’t going the way I desired, I pushed harder and held on tight to what I wanted, thinking I knew best.

But I learned along the way that there is a Higher Power with the best plan for me. My part was to open to what was before me and allow it all—the good and the bad, as I proclaimed.

And, of course, your choices would be based on you and what your journey and desires are. Abraham-Hicks says it so wisely, “See this world as a free world, and see everyone in it as trying—through their individual experiences—to find their way back to that calling, back to that Source Energy. And even though billions of them go about it in a way that is different than you would choose, there’s no right or wrong way. In other words, bless them all, and get on with the only thing you have any power about opening or closing your vortex to your natural state of Well-Being.”

The truth is that some of the most challenging and most painful experiences have been life-changing. Like

Birthing my two children Going through a divorce Having a petition to remove me from my principalship

As my teacher, Debbie Ford, taught, “There is gold in the darkness.”

You can’t see the light until you clear away the darkness, just as you can’t see the sun when the clouds hide it.

Every painful experience I’ve had has brought greater awareness and light to my life.

They weren’t mistakes. They weren’t easy.

It was a process of awakening more and more after lots of pain and heartache.

I was willing and allowed that something greater was there for me—even though, at the time, I couldn’t see it.

I became lighter and freer. I healed parts of myself. I became more trusting in a Power greater than me.

As a mentor of mine, Dr. Kim D”Eramo states, “Forgiveness is to see there was no wrongness in this situation.”

Where in your life do you need to erase the idea that there are mistakes?

How could you see these situations from another perspective? (Byron Katie’s The Work can help you with a turnaround.)

Lorie Ladd states, “There has never been anything wrong with you. You’re simply remembering you.”

These situations you may have labeled as mistakes are there to wake you up, get your attention, and help you move to a greater place.

Like being more loving, peaceful, joyful, and free. That’s what we all really want.

For example, the process of birthing a child. Pregnancy is hard, things are changing, your mind and body are going through many processes. How does this little being come to be? I’m not in charge, yet I am to care for myself and my little one in the best ways possible. The whole process taught me something greater than being in charge. Something miraculous is happening.

Where are you on believing there are no mistakes in life?

Notice your resistance to that statement, and go there. Clear that path. Look at what you are considering mistakes.

It’s not your decision to decide for me or others. We were all created in God’s image and likeness.

Remember, life is about contrast. The differences help you decide what is right and wrong for you.

Notice where you say, “I can’t forgive that person.” Go there to find your calling for what’s next for you. Give yourself grace, time and compassion.

Keep listening and seeing what’s there for you to evolve.

You wouldn’t be able to know more kindness if you didn’t see the hatred and atrocities. Can you thank those other people for being that mirror to help you see that you need to awaken to more kindness and compassion if that situation is before you? Look at all the people who show up for others in natural disasters – like the recent tornado in Sulphur, Oklahoma, that destroyed downtown. It’s horrible. But look at the hundreds of ways people open up and come to the rescue to support and help others. That’s beautiful, heart-warming and amazing.

Be willing to honor your life by feeling that all that has happened in it was for you—even though it might not have felt like it.

I’ve recently come to the realization that life is about becoming the authentic you. It’s about knowing who you are and removing all that is not you, all that you accumulated along the way that is not the real you.

That is the journey.

As you think about your life, who are you?

It’s not really about all you accumulated and all you became.

All of that is for you to discover who you are.

You can choose from the buffet of life’s possibilities to come to some conclusions about what is real for you.

I don’t know about you, but I thought life was about achieving—gaining my degrees, jobs, family, relationships, etc.

Yes, that is a pathway to finding yourself and discovering who you are. Who you authentically are.

Not the job or financial status. Not the accomplishments. Not what your parents, church or society wanted from you.

But, who are you? What matters to you? At your core?

As A Course in Miracles teaches, everything is love or a call for love.

Think about your path from the perspective of “Love.” Ask yourself lots of reflective questions. Think about all that has happened to you in your life through the decades.

How did your experiences help you get closer to LOVE?

Which ones challenged you to show more LOVE?

What has torn you open to be more LOVE?

How much do you love yourself? Or were you taught and still thinking that is selfish talk?

How are you making choices based on what you LOVE, not others?

I know choosing things for me has been a long journey. I thought I was to please my family, church, and society. Do the right thing and follow the rules. Be the good girl. Oh, yes, I have chosen another road or ten from there, helping me decide what was right for me. All helping clarify what feels good to me. Good to live in peace and contentment.

But all my lessons and experiences have helped me to become an authentic person. I still am pulled by wanting to please those close to me. Most of the time, it is what is right for me. I’m staying aware of when I choose for other people or purposes.

It doesn’t quite feel easy or at peace.

How authentic are you living?

Notice where you feel the most peace and love. That’s the authentic you.

Find ways to feel more of this, more love, joy and peace in you. Add more of those times and situations. I think about how much I loved my career in education. I gave it my all. I loved it. It was hard and stressful, but at the core, it was the best. Brought more love and joy to my life. When it wasn’t, I had to look at it and see why I was off. Then, I choose how to bring myself back to these feelings of joy instead of worry or stress.

What have you done for yourself – even when others wanted something else from you?

Take notice of where and whom are pulling you and guiding your choices rather than by you. Sometimes, the results will be the same, but make sure more of your decisions are made for you to become the most authentic you.

This topic interests me because, as I’ve read, the top things people say on their deathbed are that they wish they had lived more authentically and done more of what they wanted. I don’t want to die with the music still inside of me. I want to be at peace. I want to give all I have inside of me.

I know too many women of my generation were taught to be subservient to their spouses, losing who they were to whom their partner expected them to be.

Start paying attention to where you live for other people, circumstances or reasons.

Decide today and each day that you will make more of your choices and decisions based on what is authentic for you. Even when you notice someone might be pushing you, shift your perspective to how you can make that choice to be right for you.

The more you align with your authentic self, the more peace, joy, and love you will feel and experience in your life.

How can you begin today to live more authentically?

I’ve recently come to the realization that life is about becoming the authentic you. It’s about knowing who you are and removing all that is not you, all that you accumulated along the way that is not the real you.

That is the journey.

As you think about your life, who are you?

It’s not really about all you accumulated and all you became.

All of that is for you to discover who you are.

You can choose from the buffet of life’s possibilities to come to some conclusions about what is real for you.

I don’t know about you but I thought life was about achieving. Gaining my degrees, my jobs, my family, my relationships, etc.

Yes, that is a pathway to finding yourself and discovering who you are. Who you authentically are.

Not the job or financial status. Not the accomplishments. Not what your parents, church or society wanted from you.

But, who are you? What matters to you? At your core?

As A Course in Miracles teaches, everything is love or a call for love.

Think about your path from the perspective of “Love.” Ask yourself lots of reflective questions. Think about all that has happened to you in your life through the decades.

How did your experiences help you get closer to LOVE?

Which ones challenged you to show more LOVE?

What has torn you open to be more LOVE?

How much do you love yourself? Or were you taught and still thinking that it is selfish talk?

How are you making choices based on what you LOVE, not others?

I know choosing things for me has been a long journey. I thought I was to please my family, church, and society. Do the right thing and follow the rules. Be the good girl. Oh, yes, I have chosen another road or ten from there, helping me decide what was right for me. All helping clarify what feels good to me. Good to live in peace and contentment.

But all lessons or experiences have helped me to become the authentic me. I still am pulled by wanting to please those close to me. Most of the time, it is what is right for me. I’m staying aware of when I choose for other people or purposes.

It doesn’t quite feel easy or at peace.

How authentic are you living?

Notice where you feel the most peace and love. That’s the authentic you.

Find ways that you can feel more of this, more love, joy and peace in you. Add more of those times and situations. I think about how much I loved my career in education. I gave it my all. I loved it. It was hard and stressful, but it was the best at the core. Brought more love and joy to my life. When it wasn’t, I had to look at it and see why I was off. Then, I choose how to bring myself back to these feelings of joy instead of worry or stress.

What have you done for yourself – even when others wanted something else?

Take notice of where and who is pulling you and guiding your choices rather than by you. Sometimes, the results will be the same, but make sure more of your decisions are made for you to become the most authentic you.

This topic interests me because, as I’ve read, the top things people say on their deathbed are that they wish they had lived more authentically and done more of what they wanted. I don’t want to die with the music still inside of me. I want to be at peace. I want to give all I have inside of me.

I know too many women of my generation were taught to be subservient to their spouses, losing who they were to whom their partner expected them to be.

Start paying attention to where you live for other people, circumstances or reasons.

Decide today and each day that you will make more of your choices and decisions based on what is authentic for you. Even when you notice someone might be pushing you, shift your perspective to how you can make that choice to be right for you.

The more you live in alignment with the authentic you, the more peace, joy and love you will feel and have in your life.

How can you begin today to live more authentically?

Today is a gift.

One of the best things you can do for yourself is to make sure that you put love in every corner of your house.

Are those pictures of those you love?

Are paintings the ones that bring out the joy and creativity you feel?

Are scents what bring you into the moment?

You will be amazed at how your spirit changes.

It’s Springtime. Let’s do some Feng Shui. Go through each room and notice what thrills your heart. Keep those things. Find items that no longer have meaning or a spark for you, and let those go. Give them away. Move them out.

When you have things in your life – items, people or thoughts that are no longer serving you, it’s important to remove that density. Some things are heavier than others. Move those right away. For instance, when we were remodeling, I wanted my house to feel light, edgy and fun. My previous style was Tuscany, which is dark, dense, and heavy. Totally in contrast. So, we began changing out what we wanted piece by piece. I focused on what I wanted. Before I knew it, the energy shifted. The feeling was aliveness, lots of space and light.

Do more of what keeps your spirit up.

Maybe your closet needs a makeover. I know many people shift out spring/summer clothes for the fall/winter wardrobe. Feel how good and light that feels. Just simple things like that can do great things to lift your spirits.

But, do something more. Clean out what you are no longer excited to wear. I know it’s hard. Maybe you paid a lot for something you’ll never wear again. Be generous and give it away so someone else can have that particular moment. Perhaps you can’t fit into things and are tricking yourself into thinking someday. That’s heavy on you. That brings shame or guilt. Keep one thing special in case that happens. But allow yourself to honor where you are, not pull yourself down. Keep your spirit UP.

Take time to list three things that lift up your spirit, like having long talks with a sister or friend. What are they for you? If it’s reading a good book, give that gift to yourself. Wrap up in a blanket or sit outside. Make it sensual. Then, give away all your books. Keep the energy flowing. What you give away will come back to you tenfold. Think about the suggestions for new books you’ll receive and the joyful feelings that give you.

Life is about the small choices you make day in and day out to keep your spirits up. We lost one of our trees in the backyard right outside my dining room window last year. I loved looking at it swaying, standing tall and giving off great looks. That spot was empty for months. This week, it was replaced. I was bouncing around, joyful, laughing, and giddy at how much it meant to have one back in that space. I know Bo was probably tired of me wanting him to see it again.

What are some small things that can brighten your day at this moment? Stop and give that to yourself. We love our Skylight, which flashes photos from different trips, family get-togethers, grandkids, and such. Talk about raising the energy. I love passing by. The pictures float by, reminding me of how blessed and lucky I am and allowing me to see all that I have to love in my life.

Special moments can bring great joy and fulfillment. Find them. Give those to yourself. For years, I’ve taught my daily lessons in A Course in Miracles. This year I decided to go deeper so I joined Living The Course online. Each day, they have a video about the lesson, and then throughout the week, many group lessons about it.

Special moments to keep my spirit up.

What could be some of those special moments for you?

Life is for you to take charge and decide what brightens your world. Then, it’s your job and responsibility to align with what rings your bell.

As you can tell, there are many choices, chaos, and distractions. The challenge is to be more grounded in what is right for you. Think buffet.

I don’t want negativity or chaos in my life. I like colorful things. They bring great joy to my life. I want a simple life. Design that. Don’t have lots going on.

You choose if you want to keep your spirits up.

Decide you will no longer let outside forces decide how your life will go.

Decide you will make your choices based on what lifts your spirit. What makes you feel free as a bird to fly? Or think like a river flowing.

Let life be more straightforward and more simple for you.

Design your days around what you can do to keep your spirits high.

What can you do away with today and tomorrow so you can feel lighter and brighter?

It’s Springtime.

Bring a new way of being to you and your life. Allow your life to be filled with things that boost your being.

What will you COMMIT to that will keep your spirits up?

Share with me on Facebook.

During this Easter season, use it as a reminder of where you want your life to be.

Reflect on what’s not working so you can rise above.

Think about how you can use this spring season to help you see more light. The days get lighter earlier, and the nights stay lighter later. I love it!

How can the lighter days help you rise above the darkness in your life?

Can you use those lighter mornings for a walk to be a healthier you?

Can you use the lighter nights to sit outside with your family and bask in the energy of lightness? Can you slow down and savor the moments?

Notice the distressful things in your life.

How can you clear them away? Add more love to the situation, whether through forgiveness or kindness.

Love raises your vibration, what you see, and how you are. Spend more time in the energy and with things you love, like gardening, reading, or being with people you love.

Rise up.

Then, take on the challenges in your life. You will have a better feeling and be able to handle situations in a way that makes you rise above the problem. You are more in the energy of the solution. Remember, you can’t solve a problem on the same level.

Rise above.

Add to your repertoire the mantra “Rise above.” Say this over and over, especially when you are facing trying situations, like when you think you need to prove yourself or be right. RISE ABOVE.

Be devoted to rising up and looking for the light, the easiness and the love in life.

Think about ways you can rise above the negative chatter you might hear or share. Like:

Think about kind words you can share about your body so you can be in harmony with it. No matter how it is.

Add more positive, light thoughts to your day.

One of my intentions these days is to “See the world through the eyes of God.” I’m doing much better catching myself, lots of times throughout the day. I have reminders all around.

I’m intending to rise above the minutiae of the world these days.

I intend to believe that life is for me and all that is happening is for my Highest Good, so see how that is. Reminder: Rise Up.

How can you rise up and be grateful for all the freedoms you have? All the luxuries Americans have – clean water, electricity and all kinds of protections?

How can you use this season to rise to a higher consciousness and a better feeling place?

How can you be committed to becoming more of the light by rising to a higher frequency and be willing to live there? How powerful you can be for yourself and the greater good.

Life requires each one of us to rise above to create the world you and I desire: one that is more loving, peaceful, and easier.

You are exactly where you need to be.

When things are feeling heavy, and you want life to move more like ease and grace, you are ready and open to see another way.

In order to grow inside, you are often faced with challenges. They tend to get your attention.

As Abraham-Hicks shares, “The Universal Law of Attraction Is Managing My Expansion… The Law of Attraction is the Universal manager of all Vibration, which expands to everything that exists through the Universe. And so, at the same time that the Law of Attraction is responding to the Vibrational content of your physical thoughts, it is also responding to the Vibrational content of your Inner Being.”

Try to see any challenge or upsetting situation as an opportunity to start a new positive chapter in your life or positive behavior that will shift you to a better feeling place.

Know it’s time to move to a lighter, brighter spot in life.

Would it help you to release the resistance if you knew something higher is calling you?

Maybe it doesn’t feel that way right now, but the transformation will bring you there.

What if instead of resisting life, situations or circumstances, you could trust your own inner power? Recently, my daughter was helping one of our grandsons learn to swim. He kept resisting and being afraid. She kept trying to reassure him she had him; he could take baby steps. And, then she said, how about you trust yourself, you can do this. He decided to give it a try and go further in his swimming.

Can you trust yourself to know what’s right for you rather than doubt and resist?

Where are you on the scale of 1-10, 10 being the highest and believing that God has a perfect plan for the unfolding of your Highest Good?

What if you could become more conscious in situations you see yourself resisting? Awareness is the first step to changing behaviors.

What if you didn’t make yourself wrong when you notice you are resisting or doubting, and instead make it a game like there I go again? Awareness is key.

If you do believe, then what if you could remind yourself to focus more on the trust and belief your Highest Good is being done?

Where are you most resistant to your life or the life around you?

I could go on for pages about how I want life to be and the world to be. Resistance has been one of the things I have learned the most. It’s okay to see what I like and don’t like. It’s the energy behind them that gets life heading in the wrong direction – or the direction I don’t want. Instead of playing in the resistance energy that things shouldn’t be this way or that, I need to let that anger, frustration or rage head me in the direction of what I’d like. Like more compassion, kindness or concern.

Remember, what you focus on, you receive more of. So, if you stay in the rants about all the wrongs, you receive more of that in your life. Instead, if you can have more love, compassion, and kindness in your being, you can serve from that energy and receive more of it in your life.

Allow instead of doubt. Flow instead of resist.

The shift is big and produces big results. As A Course in Miracles says, “A miracle is a shift in perception.” The shift is what you focus on—what you want, NOT what you do not want.

How could you be open to seeing with new eyes?

Are you ready to awaken to new experiences that are different from the ways you thought things should be?

How could you know that divine right action is guiding you every day?

How could you let your goal or intention be to allow something Higher to come, even if that means learning what all your resistance means to you and your life?

What else is possible?

How could you let not knowing be okay? Instead of resisting how things are?

What if you knew what was calling you was to allow your life to be easier and more delightful by trusting and honoring yourself more?

Know these roadblocks, or frustrations with what’s happening around you, are trying to capture your attention so you can, and will choose, another way than being in the dense, negative energy of resistance.

Decide you are willing to release all inner resistance and doubt.

Be ready to receive the resources to show you your way to a lighter and brighter future and life.

Decide to be 2% more present to what is, and 2% more willing to open to new possibilities of being in the flow rather than in resistance.

Where do you need to begin releasing resistance and doubt in your life?

Life is easier on the other side of resistance and doubt.

Focusing on what you desire can be a life of freedom and peace.

When you decide that your commitment to what you desire is more important than your suffering, your life will change in the direction of more joy and freedom. For instance, your life changes when you choose light over darkness or peace over chaos.

Freedom from suffering requires devotion and commitment.

In this Easter time of resurrection, it’s time to remind yourself how you want your life to be.

Will it be easy and happen tomorrow? No. It takes time, focus, and dedication to what you desire.

Are you ready to commit? Be devoted to being free?

One of the biggest shifts in your life will be when you decide to focus more on what’s true from the INSIDE of you than reacting to what happens on the outside. For instance, I know I want freedom from suffering. Then, I can’t live with regrets or grudges from my past. I must find ways to come to peace with whatever is upsetting me or with whatever has stronghold on me about those events.

How can you free yourself from suffering?

What needs forgiveness in your life? With yourself and others?

Are you more focused on wrong-doing or on how you want to live?

How DO you want to live?

Are you committed to living in peace and joy or staying in old habits and stories of victimhood?

You don’t have to know. You only have to be clear as to what you really, really desire.
Is it easy? No.

Is it simple? No.

Being clear is sometimes tricky. You often know what you don’t want. Like, if you have an illness and don’t like that. You know you don’t want to be sick. But how that unfolds is your story, your definition. Are you focused on not being sick or wellness?

How can you be free from suffering from this illness situation? You must declare and commit to how that can be in your life. You must clearly see yourself well and live free from disease. If you are a diabetic, you must commit to the following things that help bring you to wellness. Like exercise, eating less sugar and other foods that contribute to this disease. In your mind, you must know it is possible to be well. Then, take little steps to make that happen. Day after day, week after week, months, years and so on. And, before you know it, you are living more from freedom, in this case, being well.

What are the tools you need to keep you focused or refocused?

For me, A Course of Miracles has 365 daily lessons that remind me of the life I desire to live. I love the daily reminders, which continuously refocus me.

Do you want to be in freedom from suffering?

The journey is:

Ask and expect an answer as to how that path unfolds.

Ask to be shown the light, the way.

Ask for guidance.

Life is full of challenges. These challenges can call you to be your Highest and Greatest Self, or you can stay in the problems, the obstacles.

It’s sad to say that most want to stay at the pity party. In the victim of the situation. In their story, they identify with that situation. And complain about how unfair life is to you.

If you believe, like I do, that life is calling you to the light, calling you to live to the more perfect you—not perfect, but perfectly YOU!

Then, you know life is for you. Asking you to surrender from this suffering.

A great example is my amazing husband. He recently tore his meniscus and had surgery. He does not want to be contained or limited. He lives from freedom. He is not letting this injury sideline him too much. He is going slow, to go fast. Hard. He clearly sees himself back on his bike, back doing everything he wants. He is clear on what he desires. He wants to be healthy. The physical therapy people are amazed at how well he is doing.

Your mindset matters.

No matter the fork in the road you are facing, know you can have the outcome you want rather than suffer.

As Abraham-Hicks says, “What you think and what you get is alway a perfect vibrational match, so it can be very helpful to make a conscious correlation between what you are thinking and what is manifesting in your life experiences.”

Notice where you are suffering. Notice your thoughts about that.

Just like the saying goes – pain is inevitable, and suffering is an option.

Choose freedom. Design your path there. Dedicate time and energy to that endeavor.

Know freedom is possible.

Take time each day dedicated to your commitment to free yourself from the binds that hold you back. Ask for guidance. Let it go, give it over to your Higher Power.

Decide you want to be in freedom from whatever sufferings you are facing in your life.

Go for it. Live a freer life.

I love asking questions.

I love hearing what people say about how things are going and how their lives are working.

Then, I become curious. I wonder about possibilities and what’s creating their way for them.

Out of this whole big world, what have they picked out as right for them?

Why did they choose this time and place to be here?

I remember how shocked I was when I realized everyone’s life was not like my military growing up, moving all the time, facing new situations and adapting to wherever we were.

As a kid, you only know what you are living. Until you leave home and start seeing a whole new world, people from completely different worlds.

When you start questioning. When you become curious.

And, hopefully, you have.

I know I was quite judgmental. If they weren’t in “our” church and faith, they were on the “wrong” side. If it wasn’t like “my” family and ways, something wasn’t right.

Whew, how limited I was.

Instead of realizing, each of us has our own journey and way of making meaning of the life we were given.

But, thankfully, curiosity got the best of me.
I could be inquisitive.

I could see how these wonderful people just had a “different” way to do life than I did. Not bad or good.

I can see your choices will be different from mine, and that is fine because you are living your life and doing what’s right for you.

I could see how there were endless possibilities of living our lives.

Notice where you have some habits, assumptions, and thoughts about major aspects of your life, such as education, parenting, relationships, or success.

How can you be curious about those ideas instead of set-in-stone thoughts and ways of being?

How could you allow life to be more in the flow rather than stick to the old ways and old patterns?

Can you be curious and see how the old rules are no longer working or how there is no need for them today? For instance, I think about how dressed up we used to be on airplanes. Think of today’s dress on airplanes. Totally different ends of what was and what is.

I know it’s taken me a while to adjust. I remember writing in my book how hard it was to wear my workout clothes to the grocery store almost next door. Not today.

Move to a new paradigm in how you live in life or live life. Allow it to be easy and flowing rather than rigid and based on old rules.

Use Abraham-Hick’s idea as a way to be more curious than stuck, “Cravings are going to occur to you. So here’s the rule of thumb about eating, or about investing in the stock market, or about anything else: If the impulse comes from a joyous thought that feels good, follow it. If the impulse comes from an uncomfortable thought that felt bad, don’t follow it.”

Where do you need to begin to be more curious? What rules are you living that no longer serve you, make life tougher or out of balance?

I know the saying, “You don’t teach an old dog new tricks,” but let’s let that go.

Be curious.

Be willing to live life fully with what’s here and now for you.

What’s feeling uncomfortable in your life right now?

Be curious.

Create a new set of habits and rules for you.

For instance, at this age,74, some things are different. I don’t move or bend as easily as I used to. How can I allow that to be okay? How can I honor where I am in life instead of making myself wrong?

How can you take the time to be curious about what’s working and what’s not in your life today – based on where you are, not what was?

How can you be curious and allow today to be the message for what’s right for you rather than thinking you are supposed to know the answer?

Life is short.

Be kind. Be gracious. Be open to what is before you.

Be curious.